- Sophia Cayer
Social Anxiety or Awkwardness?
Updated: May 23, 2020
So somewhere in your life’s journey, you witnessed or experienced some things that left you feeling socially anxious or awkward. Or perhaps you are among those who feel it has just been that way all your life, and that is possible. The important thing to know is that whether it is the former or the latter, you can overcome the challenge!
Life happens and our body and mind (especially our sub-conscious) remembers and reacts and responds in unpleasant or bothersome ways, in an effort to protect us. If that sounds strange, know it is true – but that is for a different article. For those who feel the issue has always been with you, it is possible you have inherited it. That too may sound strange, but even if that’s the case you are not stuck with it.
You may have tried a number of things, including EFT (Emotional Freedom Techniques) and have yet to succeed. You are definitely not alone, but the fact remains the issue can be resolved.
One of the difficulties is that while there are many ways to manage it and enjoy temporary relief, most don’t get to the core issues. When core and related issues are unresolved, anxiousness and awkwardness will return or persist.
Having done everything you can think of without the results you are looking for leaves you more frustrated than ever, giving up, convinced it is just something you have to deal with. Whether you realize it or not, those feelings and that belief tend to intensify the issue, further reducing self-esteem. Please don’t give up!
Utilize the simple tools that can help with management and temporary relief such as deep breathing, drinking plenty of water and listening to music.
Unless you are among those only minimally affected, let go of the idea you can do as suggested by many and simply change your behavior, utilizing what I refer to as the “Fake It Till You Make It” formulas. These formulas include things like, “Act Confidently”, “Engage”, “Talk”, “Display confident body language”, and more that aren’t offered here, but you get the drift. IMHO, it can be as disconcerting as someone saying “Calm down!” when you feel as if your hair is fire!
Seriously, this isn’t something you can act or talk yourself out of. So let’s get serious! Chances are you feel embarrassed, sad, angry, frustrated or ashamed that you are dealing with this, or all of the above. And who knows what the underlying causes are? You may or may not, since when you are caught up in something like this it can seem impossible to figure out. When you do have a clue, most of the time it is difficult to figure out where to start or it feels too overwhelming to even begin. It is understandable and these are natural responses. You are not broken or defective, even if that is exactly how you feel.
If you are among those who have tried EFT without success, it is time to try it again. There are a number of reasons it has yet to work. Understand that while the EFT process is simple, we are complex creatures. Patient persistence, being kind and gentle with yourself will see you through. Social Anxiety and Awkwardness are usually complex, so working with a professional is a wise choice.
Resolving core issues, limiting beliefs, altering coping and survival strategies to ones that better serve you, are imperative. If it sounds or feels overwhelming, take heart and know that one step at a time you’ll get there!
The great thing about EFT is that as you progress, enjoying cognitive shifts and internal borrowed benefits (aspects fading without being directly addressed), you’ll begin to feel encouraged and look forward to the light at the end of the tunnel that won’t be a freight train!
How long will it take? There is no way to know with absolute certainly. Just as we are unique unto ourselves, so are our life experiences and the way they impact us. What is an anthill to one person equates to a mountain for another. We never know how deep the water is until we dive in. Stay focused on the goal, knowing you can achieve it!
So what are you waiting for? Haven’t you been struggling with this long enough?
Contact me, or your favorite skilled EFT practitioner, and get started!
You’ll be pleasantly surprised at how much progress you can make!